Do Not Try this on the Playground

I have always been a bit of a nerd and loner, and during my early elementary years, I kept to my self on the playground most of the time. One day during the winter of 1966–67, when I was in first grade, most of the other kids were building a snow fort or playing “King of the Mountain” during our noon recess. As usual, I was wandering the playground alone, chewing on my coat strings, making up silly stories in my head and doing whatever else weird little loner kids do.

Then I spotted the frost covered propane tank outside of our little schoolhouse ~yummy! I thought it would be a good idea to lick the frost off. I have no one else to blame, nobody triple-dog dared me. I acted on my own out of boredom and ignorance.

Well, as soon as my warm wet tongue touched that frozen metal, you know what happened. I was stuck good. Of course, then I started bawling, and between the tears and runny nose, even more of my face attached itself. I reasoned that if I didn’t get free before the bell rang to go inside, I would be in trouble, so I cried even more! Well, the bell rang, and I was still stuck. I was on the side of the tank away from the schoolhouse, so I couldn’t be seen from inside. I worried that I would be there until spring!

But then I heard a classmate, Rodney, calling my name. My teacher had sent him out to look for me. It was hard to call for help with 3/4 of my face plastered to the tank, but I managed a muffled “Herp! Herp!” Rodney found me and his eyes got pretty big when he saw my predicament. He ran back into the schoolhouse for help. Both the first-grade and second-grade teachers as well as at least one lunch lady, came outside to help me. They had a warm container of water, which they poured over my mouth and rescued me. I was greatly relieved!

What happened next for this little loner kid was kind of exciting. Other kids were actually interested in something I had done! Some may have been impressed, but most of them probably thought “Geeze, Donna is even a bigger dumbass than we thought!” At any rate, I became famous, or maybe infamous, for a few days.

I do remember I stayed inside during afternoon recess that day. Decades later, a classmate told me that everyone went over to the propane tank that recess and observed pieces of my skin, including taste buds, still hanging on to the tank. Hopefully, this scared them enough that I prevented someone else from doing this.

I also spoke with my former first-grade teacher a few decades later and she still remembered the incident. She was a brand new teacher that year, and I was the first student she had to help rescue in this way. But I apparently was not her last. She told me that almost every year, some kid would freeze their tongue to a piece of playground equipment, bike rack or flagpole. But, she said, they don’t warn the kids against it, because many would never think to do it until they are warned against it.

SO after reading this, you may or may not want to warn your children. I was a rule-follower and know if I had been told not to, I wouldn’t have done it. But like I said, I was a weird kid!